Oh man, life is so fast! There have been multiple times where I want to sit down and write something out of the passion I am experiencing regarding a topic or lesson I am learning. For me, I'm the kind of person who needs to write out of her passions. It's hard for me to just sit and free write because it will be all over the place and I like when things tie together. So, all those things I have wanted to write about lately are just a part of me now and not something bubbling over that I can easily express at this point. I'm sure they will be posted at some point, as God continues to refine me and deepen my understanding of the recent revelations about how God is humbling me with His grace or how an intentional life of mission has been burning in me. But, I want to write about today.
Today I could have wept and worshipped for hours after church (but like I said at the beginning of this post, life is fast and sometimes I miss out on those moments that God is doing something in me, which could be a whole other blog post). But here I am now, in my weak "let's try this again" mindset, processing the Word of God that was spoken today and allowing it to penetrate my very being.
Since God has been humbling me so much regarding my need for grace, I have been asking Him to, especially in this season, remind me of the weight of my sin and the intensity of His sacrifice.
The message at church today was about Jesus in the Garden of Gethsemane before leading up to his arrest, death, and resurrection. Jesus is overwhelmed with sorrow to the point of death and three times he prays "My Father, if it is possible, may this cup be taken from me. Yet not as I will, but as you will." I have gone to church all growing up, and always read this verse as "Father, I don't want to go through all the pain and torture of being beat and pierced on a cross..."without really looking at what the "this cup" means. But, when Jesus says, "this cup" he means the cup of God's wrath!! WHOA! Like I said, call me a "church-goer since childhood" but I don't remember hearing this emphasized before, or maybe the Holy Spirit was just really highlighting it to me, because I was completely consumed with awe. The overwhelming sorrow due to his anticipation of deep agony was because of the CUP, not the cross. Now, I'm sure he wasn't looking forward to the beatings or death on a cross, but his intense prayers that lead to sweating blood was because of the CUP!
The cup of God's wrath is filled with God's fury towards OUR sin. The sinless Savior willingly endures the wrath of God that WE deserve as sinners! God knew His rescue plan for mankind since before time began which was to sacrifice His only Son (and ultimately himself, when looking at the trinity) in order to save mankind.
I was in tears as we spent time singing to the One who drank every last drop from the cup for me...and for you!
There's no greater love than this.